I wanted to share this devotional that someone reminded me of in a guest book post. (Thank you!)
If I remember correct, this was the devotional posted the day before
Brandon's grandfather passed away in a tragic car accident. This was
also in the middle of our first battle with cancer.
I keep praying that God will allow me to rest in this truth when things get more difficult ahead.
It's hard to imagine things getting harder then they are now. But it
will. The ache is not complete yet. I can still look into his eyes, hear
him weakly call me sweetie, see him smile when he sees Aria. I'm scared
of how deeply it will hurt to only have memories of all of that. We did
all of life together. We work together, live together, and yet still
enjoy all our time together. We rarely fight. We take on each other's
interests with joy. We have always looked at it that HE doesn't have
cancer, WE have cancer. WE have lupus. We are a team. And as hard as it
is to watch the person you love the most suffering like this, I know
it's going to be much harder on the other side.
I still have hope now. I still have my husband. I still have my little
family we dreamed of and prayed for. I guess I'll have to find new hope
on the other side to get through the days. Right now it feels like my
hope will be to just make it through the heartache of each day.
I will do my best to cling to that devotional.
I pray that if you too are in the valley of suffering and if you are reaching hopelessness that it speaks to your heart too.